finale

it has finally ended. a saga that started on the day i enrolled my self to do form 6 in 2006. what started out as a dare, then a genuine disliking, evolved into a true liking, matured on to become something more concrete, followed by silent suffering, overwhelming guilt and exaggerated remorse, aged today to become a memory that will serve a mark for me on my only and last attempt to embrace what i am not.

i tried to shake off a part of me that took 5 long miserable and painful years to accept it, to become what the society sees me as, but alas today i had a reality check that, no*pausing and LOLing to the way a character speaks in tv drama*matter how much i tried, it is not going to materialize. i fated to be who i am, albeit knowing that before, i tried. believe me, i tried and the pain is real as well, surprisingly.

this day also reminded me of a support which i treasure very much, and knowing that WE is impossible, being YOU and ME, is more than i can ask for. and to my saga, these last 3 years have only sowed in me the fact, true feelings will never die, it just changes its directions and  for your own good, i hope our paths never cross again. your changed one to many times,  really hope this time, it will last till where you want it and how you want it. sadly enough, i am not going to wait and see it with you and to me, a new beginning awaits me. i hope this will beginning will lead to a good ending, no matter how it is. bon voyage to me and you.